New Theory

[Outside Loop]

Heard recently that you can forget all that stuff about lift, drag,Thrust,power etc.

The reason helicopters fly is because of money.

The reason they can hover is that they are so ugly the earth repels them.

The big fan up top therefore is not to provide lift. Its to keep the pilot cool.If you want proof, switch it off and watch the pilot sweat.

If you push the stick fwd the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back the houses get smaller. That is unless you keep pulling back, then the houses get bigger again.

Anybody else heard any other contemporary theories ?

[Cadfael]

When the pax on the right hand side scream...bank left, when the pax on the left hand side scream...bank right. If they all start screaming together, lottsa backstick.

[Uncle joe's mintballs]

Never trust an aircraft where the wings go faster than the fuselage!

[helidrvr]

never trust an aircraft where the rotors have seized.

[offshoreigor]

Ya goota love the Helicopter industry. It's the only Business where you need a very large fortune to make a small one!

There must be 10 minutes spacing between Aircraft after a Helicopter shoots an ILS...this gives the Maintanance crew time to re-assemble the localizer radial/glideslope after the rotors have chopped them up!

Picture the following:

A high performance siezed-wing sits perched on a mountain top. The back seater exclaims to the Pilot "I'm sure glad you cross trained from Helicopters!!!"

Cheers, OffshoreIgor

[rotorque]

When I die, I want it to be like my father - Quietly in his sleep

Not like his four passengers who were SCREEMING ALL THE WAY DOWN!!

[helidrvr]

A helicopter: 10,000 parts flying in lose formation...